Legends of dispassion or 'I do not want that you see the "- the suffering of young Bella

Warning: Spoilers ahead!
Caveat: I devoured all the books of the Twilight series.
Reading it was also amusing to see everything from the perspective of the constantly circling around itself Bella.
This navel-gazing one knows of himself ... 16 years old you is the very center of the world and sometimes highly surprising that it does not like MIB starts to rain when sitting at home listening to soft rock and the face of injustice in the world dissolves into tears.
And enough potential for identification provides the easy clumsy character of Bella in the books, too.

Unfortunately, the whole thing looks rather then filmed unintentionally funny, and can identify and you want to be with Bella then probably not.
Grumpy and pale she trudges through the movies, and you have very surprised that not only a centuries-old vampire (at this point a spirited WTF - this 'old man' in the form of a still bleary-eyed acting Blass nose really selects a stroppy 16 year old Vollpubertierende as an object of desire?!?! ???) never developed ending interest, but also a werewolf.
But enough of Vorgeplänkels ...

The films I had to watch a younger relative - for this part of it reserved wisely a late show for some time after the release.
The predecessors were, after all, from time to time for a laugh well, not least because these films take so seriously and therefore come so dramatically that all parts of the Dark Knight series by Christopher Nolan compared act as cheerful, life-affirming comedy.

"Twilight Breaking Dawn - Biss zum Ende der Nacht Part I" is here but it still one.

Already during the preparations for the wedding acts Bella, as she should attend their own funeral.
(Btw: unbelievable what this child does everything just to the stubborn rock-hard friend to move to sexual activities she married, though she has spent the last x films in order to oppose that..)
In her case, the marriage is at the same time bid farewell to her family, because she wants to be a vampire to convert, and then assumes NMD to be back to see more.
The ceremony itself is then - after endless long as a seemingly in Slo Mo invasion - treated rather according to the principle 'short & crisp'.
Hochzeitscrasher Jacob proves his sense of timing and tells her briefly after marriage during the celebrations, as disgusting their plans and what they will be, even for a monstrosity.
This is followed by a highlight, as it turns into a visually miserable CGI wolves and it bounces wailing.

This is followed by the honeymoon and the long-awaited wedding night.
There are so pale bones rattling in the moonlit water (of course, family safe, it's a bisl as the Passionata advertising from the 90s - the bra falls only when one sees the tumor equal prominent spine and nothing else), and the next morning you can see the Eddie must have been raging in the bedroom like the fox in the henhouse - spring flight thanks torn cushions, and destroyed furniture included.
Bella, however, resembles a Dalmatian away, since it was now visually enhanced with some haematomas (well ... at least some color).
But she is happy, got what they so longed for ever, sitting still intoxicated with love on the bed and can intellectually love night to reminisce - and then comes Eddie, who has returned to his accustomed stone type.
The following is a milestone in film history when it comes to dialogue among lovers.
He croaks unbearable larmoyant and insensitive to himself (bruises on your skin / I'm a freak / I never forgive me), she keeps with devout hymns on his sexual prowess and declarations of love on the other hand.
Having then placed her lifelong abstinence in view, it asks for your wishes for breakfast.
Unbelievable.
(Let us try only even begin to put into place: just married the great love, the first time ever had sex - and then shows you your opposite the cold shoulder How romantic..)
In the subsequent period she begs him formally to attention and sexual encounters that he deviates from always with waidwundem views.
Two weeks after this ominous night notes Bella, she now wears a vampire human hybrids in itself.
Ironically, the family of her beloved has more to say than Monsignor himself (he sees her in silence while spitting, because her mobile phone rings and the dear family erfährts), which packs the suitcase only to rapid manner and his best intestinal flu face shows.
In his view there is only one solution 'We're going home, father will get the thing out of you'.
Bella holds against it and so their long suffering begins.
Emphasis on long.
Very long.
Unbearable long.
The so far not too beloved 'sister' Rosalie is to Bella's only ally, the rest of the family and of course, most notably Eddie try to motivate them to have abortions.
While Bella externally turns increasingly to Christiane F with water belly, there are of course a bisl Nebenherhandlung around the house the Cullens: The werewolves rehearse Zwergenaufstand, both among themselves and against the vampires, Bella's father is always sad .... oh yeah ... a doomsday scenario and Grabesstille.

Unfortunately, all too clearly how much the writers have struggled to film every minute - it just happens nothing.
There are two highlights: 1st wedding / honeymoon and 2nd birth / transformation.
Since the first highlights was still dealt with quickly, the time must be filled until delivery anyway.
Unfortunately not with characterization or development of the characters, but only with a lot of unimportant filler.
Bella suffers.
Eddie sulking.
The family is worried.
The werewolf pack rumbles and growls.

For long stretches, you only see the decline Bellas, similar is tormented by her younger occupants as the crew in Alien from the same parasite.
So you drink blood, can mistreat and swears the child their love.
Shortly before twelve hears Edward suddenly the thought of the child and spontaneously disappears murder his desire - and he smiles after 100 minutes melancholy again.
Meanwhile, the child passes on circus performances, Bella drawn further out, breaks her when Stramplen perk up the bones and last but not least also the backbone.
The birth (a kind of cesarean with vampire teeth running) may have initially sent to the eternal ice their own family planning in many 13 year olds.
Good that the audience values ​​130min had the popcorn eating previously.
Enjoy your meal!

The transformation seems Bellas contrast to almost nostalgic - I felt while traveling through the blood vessels and organs strongly to an old episode 'Once upon a time recalls the life' and was almost disappointed that no cell was speaking as a guide.

Shortly after the 'birth' dissolve then all problems rappzapp in be pleased with - the good Jacob is embossed on the little worm (developed downright clairvoyant abilities when he sees morph into a perspective Mini Bella to teeny ... times ernthaft - a 18 year-old and a newborn ?! As shrugging my eyebrow ...), the impending battle with the other werewolves is then in an almost endless sequence via telepathy prevented (oha ... he is influenced ... then yes ... because guys can we do nothing going on ... We go rabbit hunting, which also taste ... subbi) and peace is in the forest.

Bella then blossomed in the last minute of film the right approach ... Beauty not only to direct all Kncoehnbrüche, no, her hair gets new momentum and impressive volume. Magically, the Vampirisierung goes uch with bronze-colored, heavily-applied eye shadow and eyeliner along ... (make-up artist inside?).
An eye impact is uuuuuund granted her
END.

Amen.
This film impressed by absolute numbness, and especially in the part where these 3 parts structured and highly stylized love story should find their glittering highlight.
Apart from the lip service you get with any of affection, and that is not yet on Ice King Edward, the affective leveled the entire film distances itself from all and does what he does best: yourself allegations.
Bella / Stewart has at least 2x smiled - because ic silent merciful to their other benefits.
Where it really is absolutely ersatunlich they so attached to the little parasites - and to her husband, who certainly would not hope on the price as 'Husband of the Year' is.
The film is distinguished mainly by incredible lengths - in every episode GZSZ or Grey's Anatomy you get offered more and learn more about the characters than this gem.