- It lists the main themes of crises: the education of children, money in the couple, in-laws, housework, work, sexuality.
When we have no problem, we're pretty proud of yourself. And when you meet any of the above problems, it's reassuring to know that other couples can also tear for such trivial reasons that sharing household chores.
- This book finger on the difference between men and women. For example why the woman is recovering more easily an argument while the man continues to face the woman wants ... Why talk about the problem, and why man takes this attitude as an attack. So why anything can happen in a crisis.
- It also provides in a very pragmatic and direct solutions. For example, the conflict with in-laws: the author does not lead us on communication techniques, and does not explain the art of compromise. He said directly that the only valid strategy is that the husband should always take the side of his wife against his mother, defending the "we" tooth and nail against the outside. Because his mother will eventually calm down and do it because it is his mother, while his wife may not. For that alone, this book is a gem!
It also enters the bacon certain preconceived ideas: such as communication first. For example, even a so-called critical with the technique called positive communication remains critical. And criticism is rarely constructive. It can be if the criticism is balanced by 10 compliments, and in this case it will simply be taken.
Recognize that some problems are insoluble, and do not ever make it to the surface.
For me, it's not bad called into question some of my ideas on the couple and what it should be. It is both reassuring to know that all couples go through crises, and it demystifies not many things.
It also encourages them to be more responsive in everyday life, and empowers each member of the couple: everyone is responsible for what he says, and the reaction he faces what he is told.
